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🎬 High Concept Thursdays
Every Thursday, we pitch the stoniest, dumbest, most Hollywood-worthy weed ideas we can dream up.
Because if Netflix can greenlight a show about a sandwich that time travels… why not this?
This week’s pitch:
🔬 Breaking Dab
He broke bad… and dabbed worse.
🧪 The Premise:
Meet Walt Dabson — a broke, washed-up high school chem teacher from the Canadian suburbs. Tired of cheap weed, rude dispensary cashiers, and being “respected” by exactly zero of his students, Walt decides to take control of his fate… and his terps.
He doesn’t cook meth.
He doesn’t cook dinner.
He cooks shatter — pure, golden, slabbed-out, lung-slapping art.
🧠 The Hook:
What if Breaking Bad was about cooking BHO in your buddy’s garage, getting in turf wars with vape influencers, and slowly transforming into a cartel kingpin with sticky fingers and a portable torch?
Yeah. That.
👨🔬 Meet the Cast:
👨🔬 Walt Dabson
Drives a Mazda 3 with a cracked windshield and uses a salad spinner for terp separation. Keeps saying he’s “one drop away from a brand deal.” He’s not.
🧢 Jessie Spliffman
Walt’s former student. Still somehow in 11th grade. Calls everyone “yo.” Gets lost in the lab and eats activated coconut oil by accident. Has a YouTube channel that no one watches called Couchlock Diaries.
👩 Skysativa Dabson
Walt’s wife. Thinks “dabbing” is TikTok dancing. Tries to sell essential oils to people in the waiting room of the dispensary. Is this a pyramid scheme? Yes.
🕵️♂️ Hank the Dank Cop
Walt’s brother-in-law. Vape cop. Pretends to vape CBD but hits 94% live resin carts during stakeouts. Suspects Walt. Just can’t prove it… yet.
🧪 Season 1 – Certified Gas Only
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Ep 1: “The Set-Up”
Walt discovers a way to make shatter so potent it unlocks childhood memories AND adult debt. -
Ep 3: “Slab Lab”
Jessie brings a raccoon into the lab and it steals an ounce of trim. Everyone agrees to just never talk about it again. -
Ep 6: “This Is Resin Country”
A rival shatter crew called The Terpenators shows up with Diamond Sauce. Walt responds with a 3-gram slab and passive-aggressive notes. -
Season Finale: “Walter White Ash”
Walt dabs too hard and sees the future. It’s just a vape shop with 700 beard oils and no WiFi.
📡 The Aesthetic:
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Shot like Breaking Bad, but everyone’s eyes are red.
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Every episode ends with someone saying, “Bro… that hit.”
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Jesse wears the same hoodie all season.
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Cameo by Snoop as “Shatter Jesus.”
💬 Final Word:
Breaking Dab is about risk, loyalty, and shatter that’s technically illegal in three provinces.
It’s the story of one man chasing his high… and his margins.
And if Hollywood doesn’t pick this up, we’re selling it to Crave with subtitles and calling it Canadian Cartel Chronicles instead.
🔥 Would you stream it?
Tag your local budtender. Drop a 🧪 emoji. Or comment your dream casting for Jessie Spliffman.
(We’re leaning Pete Davidson but unwashed.)