🧊 Cannabis Cucumber Chill Shots: The Spa Day That Hits Back
Let’s talk about the unsung hero of weed edibles: refreshing snacks. Yeah, brownies are cute and all, but sometimes you want your high to wear a white robe, talk about its aura, and whisper “namaste” while massaging your soul from the inside out.
Enter: the Cannabis Cucumber Chill Shot — the drink Gwyneth Paltrow would sneak into Goop if she had a blunt in her Birkin.
These little green miracles are basically cucumber spa water that got into edibles and never looked back. They’re light. They’re classy. They’re microdosed. And they hit like a surprise text from your ex that just says, “yo.”
🥒 So… What Is a Chill Shot?
It’s exactly what it sounds like:
A tiny spa-themed shot made from cold-pressed cucumber, lemon, mint, and just enough THC oil to make your chakras take a smoke break.
Imagine sipping it, eyes closed, pretending you’re in Tulum, but actually you’re in your kitchen wearing pajama pants that say “Butt First, Coffee.” The shot doesn’t judge. The shot gets it.
And the high?
It’s gentle. Like, “I think I’ll vacuum but I also might journal about my childhood” gentle.
🛒 What’s in These Fancy Little Green Monsters?
- 1 large cucumber (aka the Beyoncé of vegetables)
- Half a lemon (for that sassy citrus kick)
- 6–8 fresh mint leaves (straight outta your mom’s herb garden)
- 1 tsp honey or agave (optional but highly recommended if you’re dramatic)
- 4 drops of THC oil (adjust for tolerance or vibes)
- Ice (not optional, we’re not savages)
🍹 How to Make Them Like a Bougie Stoner Boss
- Peel that cucumber like you’re on Top Chef: Toss it in a blender with lemon juice, mint, honey, and ice.
- Blend until smooth enough to catfish someone.
- Strain the juice like your toxic friendships — no chunks allowed.
- Pour into shot glasses (bonus points for mason jars or something that screams “I own a ring light”).
- Float a drop of THC oil on top like it’s the star of its own weed reality show.
- Cheers to self-care and making poor decisions in a very hydrated way.
🧘♀️ The Vibe: “Namaste, But Also High AF”
These aren’t your bro’s muddy weed butter brownies. These are clean, classy, and spa-core. Think Goop meets Cheech & Chong. Or like, if Kourtney Kardashian did a wellness collab with Snoop Dogg.
- Pre-yoga toke-ups
- Gossip brunches where no one eats but everyone judges
- Hot girl walks that end in lying on the grass staring at clouds shaped like bongs
💚 Health-ish Bonus
You’re literally drinking cucumber, mint, and lemon. That’s basically a detox. Which means it cancels out the pizza you’re ordering later.
Also, it’s cold-pressed, so you can lie and say you’re “alkalizing.”
These Are Classy AF, But They Still Slap
The Cannabis Cucumber Chill Shot is perfect if you want to feel high, hydrated, and a little bit like you’re better than everyone (but in a fun way). Whether you’re taking one before brunch, after work, or during an emotionally loaded group chat — they deliver calm, cool, and mildly chaotic energy.
Try it today.
Get high. Stay cool. Judge quietly.
